Emotive & Divination
by DragonsExist
Summary: After a century of instant gratification, I found self-discipline… challenging." --Jasper Hale
1. Emotive

I still don't own Twilight.

This oneshot was written for the lovely **richinlaughter**.

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**Emotive**

Alice had warned me that the girl would be selfish, but I brushed it off, not seeing how her actions would affect me. I mean, seriously, human selfishness had nothing on a selfish vampire. The emotion in them was laughable, hitting me with a pang that I could compare to the feeling of cracking my knuckles. When a selfish vampire crossed my path—Rosalie for example—it felt like a sucker punch to the gut, enough to knock the wind out of a human.

I'd been near Edward when he had unconsciously made the decision to pursue Bella. As always, he thought he was doing it out of selfishness, and that combined with his strong will to have her caught me off guard. I was so shocked that he would finally do something to aid in his happiness that I didn't control the wave of selfishness that hit me, and poor Tyler Crowley bore the brunt of it.

We were in the gym playing basketball when Tyler fell into what was deemed an 'asthmatic fit,' when really he was experiencing an emotional whirlwind. He wheezed from the force of it, gripping the ball tightly to his chest, the only thing he had in his possession to be covetous of.

So, of course I thought that I had no need to worry about the dainty human.

But then, she became a constant staple at the Cullen home. Isabella Swan: clumsy human, boring girl, and perhaps a tasty snack. It was her selfish nature that had forced me out of my own home.

It started simply enough with Alice promising Edward that him and the Girl were fated. He himself knew Alice's gift, knew that her visions were subjective, even knew that she could manipulate them by assuming certain scenarios just to see how their outcomes would play out. Had it not crossed his mind that she could _assume_ Bella was fated to be his mate and not his meal? That she could see the path that would lead him to the outcome _she_ wanted? Surely he was aware that if he ate the Girl—as he should've—that he still wouldn't have been lonely. All he had to do was see someone he liked and said 'Hey Alice, how would me and this human fare?" He didn't though. Couldn't see past his own brooding to consider the possibility.

That was another thing I suffered from the Bella Swan Effect (BSE). She turned my favorite brother into an idiot. But that's neither here nor there.

So, like I was saying, because of Bella I was once again a nomadic vamp. Time I would usually spend relaxing with my wife, making love to her, and enjoying being around the 'family' was cut short. Instead, I wandered the forest alone. It wasn't because the Girl was at the house all the time, her visits weren't really that frequent, but the BSE had affected everyone.

Rosalie's anger and vanity had taken a turn for the worst. There was never a moment where she wasn't pissed off at Edward or annoyed with the Girl. This led to her ill feelings toward Alice for endorsing their relationship to begin with. She even had _angry_ sex with Emmett, needing to find some way to release all of her stress. I could only be around her in small increments of time.

Emmett, who was normally good-humored, was uncharacteristically nervous all the time; walking a thin line between supporting Edward and his new toy, and wanting to keep his wife happy. He never said anything about it, carrying on as usual, but the anxiousness around him was palpable, making me want to pull my own hair out.

Carlisle and Esme were just…annoying. Their combined desire for Edward to finally be happy and experience love the way they had was a strong force. A force that typically led to couples mating. That would normally be fine, but I wasn't mating with my own partner as much as we used to, and their emotions left me…frustrated.

Which brings me back to Edward.

I hadn't had the urge to rip a vampire and watch them burn since I'd helped Maria create her newborn army. Edward had the attention span of a thirteen-year old child. One moment he was sullen, and the next he was angry about his lot in life. He was determined to leave the Girl, he was determined to stay with the Girl. He was horny all the time, but could barely separate that feeling from his bloodlust. All of these emotions I would instinctually block, but to do that when the whole house was on edge…I just didn't possess the strength.

Lastly was my sweet, sweet, wife. All of her time was spent on helping the happy couple. Providing them excuses to spend time together, telling Edward he wouldn't hurt the Girl, using her visions to make sure everything played out as _she_ saw it. Not how it had to be mind you. I hunted alone, spent time away from the house, didn't even bother her for alone time anymore because I knew it was pointless.

On one particular hunting trip, when we were finally alone, I flooded her with all of the emotions coursing through me. I was finally at peace in the woods, Alice's tiny body hovering over me as I sought that moment of infinite bliss. And it was close, so close, but before I could reach that edge, her mouth formed the words that sliced through me like a sword.

"_Bella_!"

Apparently the vision couldn't wait, but her husband could.

It wasn't until September the thirteenth that I lost my grip on my remaining control. My worst thoughts were all confirmed. The Girl knew how her presence had changed our lives. Knew that the Volturi could come and behead and burn us all. Knew the discord she had caused amongst Rosalie and her brother, though she'd never admit it, her favorite brother. She knew the burn Edward felt when he wanted to be near her, yet she constantly pushed him for more. Worse yet, she knew I carried it all.

Her selfish nature was so overwhelming that I was intoxicated by it. No one noticed this though. As usual, they just presumed I couldn't handle being around the Girl.

The mind-reader and the future-seer wouldn't be able to stop me when I had decided on the course of action I knew I had to take. I felt like I was back in Texas, Maria whispering in my ear, "seek, kill, destroy." But the Girl wouldn't get a rebirth into the next life.

Not if I could help it.

Blocking out all of _my_ emotions, and definitely not deciding on anything but staying away from the girl, I fed from those around me.

Edward's love, Carlisle's and Esme's desire, and Rosalie's anger invaded me quickly.

I only hoped I could detach the Girl's head from her body in time.

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**A/N**

**Go to community (dot) livejournal (dot) com/forkshighschool to check out where I got THIS prompt, and perhaps you can write or request a fic that you are dying to see written! Anything goes.**

**Let me know what you think!**


	2. Divination

Outtake from the the o/s Emotive

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**Divination**

APOV

"So, are you excited for tonight?" I asked, already knowing what her response would be but indulging her anyways.

In 7.5 seconds she would answer after flushing an unattractive tomato-esque color, and then politely (and with the excitement of an earthworm) say 'yes.'

Nine seconds after that, I would be able to inhale the air around me again, without the threat of pulling her creamy little neck to my mouth and satisfying a long dormant hunger that had been too long denied. Then, I would be reassuring her that she truly did look great, and that the jeans weren't too tight. And of course, Bella, Edward loves that color blue on you.

I sighed heavily, but not heavy enough for her human ears to pick up on my infinite boredom.

Complete and utter boredom.

_And time to stop breathing in three, two, one…_

_Ah, there's the tomato red._

"Yes, I'm excited," she said, sounding all melancholic. "It's just, I think the jeans are _too_ tight, Alice. The shirt…you think he'll like it, really?"

"Of course he'll like it," I said, tapping my fingers to my head to assuage the headache I felt coming. Wait, can vampires get headaches?

"I know, I know. Never bet against Alice," Bella smiled, easily mistaking my gesture.

"That's right!" I said, briefly wondering if I should look back into Angela Weber's future to see if she and Edward wouldn't have been the better fit after all; remembering just as quickly why I didn't steer Edward in her direction to begin with.

Angela's impossibly kind-hearted soul was the perfect little girl her father—Pastor Weber—raised her to be. Just as smart as Bella (if not smarter) she could quote scripture and work out algorithms simultaneously. Not a big deal, but Angela and Carlisle had a lot in common…later this would have caused a problem for Esme, had I let things go this course; hence why Bella was the next best thing.

However, Angela would have been able to convince Edward that he had a soul in 26 days where it would take Bella years.

Actually decades, but you say _potato_, I say _pomme de terre_.

"Well, I need to get to Jasper. Edward will be back in one minute, 34 seconds. Just wait for him up in his room," I said, quickly departing.

* * *

Two minutes later I was juggling an apple and two bananas in front of Jasper. I knew the feelings that coursed through him, because at the moment, it was being pushed in my direction; Edward's bloodlust and pent-up sexual hunger. But I needed to keep his thoughts clear so that Edward wouldn't know what I had planned. Something he could easily figure out if Jasper questioned the errant feelings roaming in me.

It worked too. All Jasper thought was "_why on earth is Alice playing with that food…no big deal, Edward plays with his food too._" I knew this because when Edward saw Bella in those skintight jeans—bent over to pick up a stack of books she had knocked over, again—he got an erection, and immediately checked to see if anyone else was home. He instantly picked up Jasper thoughts, and mumbled to himself "why is Jasper fixated on a banana."

Yeah, it was a long path to take to ascertain Edward's thoughts, but I was psychic not a mindreader!

"Let's hunt," I said, knowing that would be the last thing Edward heard before Bella caught him checking out her rack. To be fair, he was just lost in thought—Jasper's thoughts—so his absentminded gaze had nothing to do with her breasts…not at that point anyway.

Without a word Jasper followed me out, leaving the lovebirds alone as we covered ten miles in seconds, and another twenty in minutes. When I was sure we we're out of Edward's _hearing_ range, but not out of Jasper's _feeling_ perimeter, I stopped.

"Give it to me," I said

"W-What?"

"Jasper, our time is short. Give it to me."

Without further hesitation he gave me what I requested, unleashing every emotion that swirled beneath his surface. Including a lust so powerful that before I had time to _see_ it, he had me pressed face forward into a tree.

Did I mention I was naked?

I was a little shocked to feel the ire that hit me, but put that thought away since there wasn't enough time to dwell on it.

"Jasper," I gasped, feeling the head of his stiff cock resting on my lower back as he grabbed my wrists, lifting them above my head. Moments later, he was whirling in circles around me in a flash of white light. With each loop my wrists came closer and closer together, binding me to the tree. I purposely cleared my head, not wanting to _see_ anything, but wanting to _feel_ everything.

After all, this was why I brought him here. Someone needed to make use of all the excess carnality that Edward and Bella didn't know what to do with, and my poor Jasper bore the brunt of the abuse when they would just shove the feelings away.

I was all too happy to help him ease that burden.

I knew it would've sickened Edward to know that _his_ urges were being satisfied this way. To know that Jasper thought of lying between Bella's legs, his mouth buried deep between her naked thighs as he satisfied his thirst by feeding from her iliac artery then…

"Alice," Jasper hissed.

Uh, yeah, as I was saying, I knew it wasn't personal, I knew he didn't want Bella (he didn't even really like her, something I would work on later!) but he couldn't help but receive and give emotion. So, I took Jasper out of Edward's presence, allowing him to exorcise his demons with me.

_Through me, on me, in…me._

"Alice, dear, we both know this won't keep you," he whispered, his tongue snaking out to taste the bite mark he'd put behind my earlobe just last night. "But I trust you'll be a good little girl, like your _friend_," he said, sneering the last word, "and let them hold you in place. Just for good measure," he added, striking me with a tidal wave of obedience and anticipation so strong I nearly fell to my knees.

"Tell me you'll stay put, Alice," he demanded, pulling my hips from the bark and nestling his cock in between my lower cheeks. Moving his hands slowly up my sides, he halted when they grazed my breasts. He reached around, weighing one in each palm before tugging at my nipples. His disembodied voice was memorizing as he repeated his demand into my neck.

"Tell me."

"Yes." It was the only word I _could_ say.

Holding steady to the tree, I took a step back and spread my legs, pushing my ass out at his insistence. Knowing hands caressed my backside with military precision, cupping and squeezing me before they worked their way down one leg and back up the other.

"So wet, Alice," he said, slipping his strong, masculine hands to my thigh before roving higher, letting one lone finger brush against my clit. A strangled moan escaped my throat as I fought to keep my hands in position. He, too, must have sensed my struggle, and I was subsequently struck with wave of submission. The second time his fingers brushed against me, I sighed in pleasure, silently begging him for more.

Jasper's fingers disappeared, but I didn't get the chance to protest as his cool breath fluttered against me, cooling the aching flesh in between my thighs.

"Spread," he panted, taking a seat so that my ankles now flanked his waist. "I want to hear you."

He dove in immediately, exploring me with his lips and tongue, curling and nipping and flicking his flattened tongue until tremors began to shake me. My passionate moans and guttural screams only spurred him on, and I wanted to stick my fingers in his golden hair, hold him to me, but I was still held by his will. Rising to my tip toes, I inched forward like a graceful ballerina, putting him exactly where I wanted him to be.

He acquiesced, sliding his tongue deep inside, allowing the vibrations of his satisfied groan to vibrate through me. It was wet and cold and in and out, re-discovering places he'd been intimately acquainted with. And I was so close, I just needed a little more…

"Jazz!" I yelled, as he gently bit down on my clit, swiftly bring me to completion.

I desperately tried to hold on to the intoxicating, yet all-too-brief series of lovely convulsions that were slowly receding; but he helped me. Letting me ride the euphoric wave out on his fingers, against his mouth, and god-help-me with his powers as he heightened my orgasm.

_Did I mention how nice it is being married to an empath?_

If I were human, I would've have melted into a pile of goo. Instead, I ripped my bindings away, freeing my hands. In one fell swoop, I dropped to my knees, taking his rigid length into me. Our moans and groans were nothing short of animalistic as he grabbed my small hips, using my body to massage every inch of his erection that was now firmly buried within me.

"Tight…so good," he groaned, angling my body backwards to trail his fingers down my neck.

"For you."

His hand slid down my neck, rubbing my shoulders before they played in the valley of my breasts. Arching my back even more, I rested my palms on either side of his legs, taking harsh and uneven breaths when I felt him latch on to my nipple. There were no lazy movements, he played my body with skill, sucking and biting as his other hand pinched and pulled.

Wrapping his arms around my waist, he pulled me back up to him, his mouth still suckling from me while his cock urged me to come. His movements had become fierce, and every deadened cell in my body focused on the thrill his hips brought me with each upward slam.

He was close, I could _feel_ it, and without my permission a vision seized me.

_Our afternoon coupling sending ripples of lust back to the house. Edward couldn't hear us, but he felt us. Stupid, selfish, childish Bella goading him to push his limits; making him feel guilty for her insecurity. Then…blood. No!_

"Bella!" I called, frantically jumping up and running towards the house. I would have just enough time to make it to my room, throw on a dress, and pull him out of his trance. I was almost there, mentally calling Edward's name, and knowing he couldn't hear me when his appetite for blood took over.

Didn't they see? I had a plan, and though getting there was excruciating, the final pay-off would be divine.

I continued to run. Not once looking back.


	3. MindReader

A/N Because nice people wanted Edward's POV. Thank you RichInLaughter and Coxie for the pre-read!

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**Mind-Reader**

Quiet.

For once in my life I had peace and fucking quiet.

After seventeen years of constant chatter in my first life, I found it hard to decipher my thoughts and wishes from the verbal onslaught of those around me. My mother was always going on about whom she wanted me to marry—some society girl named Helen who always smelled like day old bread. My father was pushing me toward the university, hoping I would become the businessman that he was. And even my peers talked non-stop about the war, and how they planned to come back heroes from the service.

So before I knew it, I had decided I would go to war, I would be the hero, and goddamn it I would marry Helen—bathe her in rose petals every night so that I could stand to be around her—and protect her the same way I would my country.

All of those things would occur after I graduated from the university, of course.

Yet, in the end, none of what I wanted, or what I thought I wanted, mattered. I was dead and buried before I could enlist with the troops, and what should've been my death bed became the place of my rebirth.

Birth into vampirism.

I couldn't say that I immediately hated the idea when my new father—Carlisle—told me what I had become. If anything, I was enamored with the possibilities: I _could_ go to war, I _couldn't_ die, and I would most definitely be the champion and distinguished gentleman I had—_mostly, sort of, I think—_wanted to be.

Carlisle had gently told me that it wasn't a possibility, that there were rules and secrets that had to be kept. I scoffed at his words, deciding I would still fulfill those dreams that were _mostly, sort of, I think_, mine.

This foolish ideology kept me company and somewhat grounded as I worked to control my new vampiric urges. While I worked to resist the smell of humans passing the secluded cabin Carlisle had brought me to. While I worked on applying just the right amount of pressure to keep eggs from being shattered and doors intact. While I worked diligently to prolong my masturbatory sessions.

I didn't care that I could get another erection within a minute. I wanted the feeling of being fully sated to last more than the few seconds it took me to bring myself to orgasm.

My father didn't further discourage my plight. He remained as patient as ever, telling me I would understand the situation better when I passed my newborn stage. Naturally, he was right, but not in the way that either of us expected.

My first trip to the city—amongst humans—proved that I would definitely not be going to the war. Hell, I didn't even want to leave our cabin again when I discovered that I could _hear_ them. Every man, woman, child… every last fucking one of them I heard loud and clear. And God help me, they were shouting at me.

In my head!

I freaked right the fuck out and quickly withdrew into myself as Carlisle led me away from the city and moved us to a more rural environment. The mindreading was yet another aspect of my new life that I had to work on controlling, and I was tired of _working_ on things.

So damn tired.

The next few years I spent travelling, killing, and brooding as Carlisle acquired new family members. More voices and personalities I had to _work_ to ignore.

Reprieve came years later in the form of Alice and Jasper. I didn't mind reading Alice's thoughts for it reminded me of looking through a viewfinder—I couldn't wait to see what was next. She also took some of the workload off of me.

Now, she could look to see if our secret had been compromised. She could calm Rosalie down when her moods swung out of control. She could cheer me up when I needed a break from the banality that was my existence.

And Jasper…He was the brother I never knew I wanted. Besides having someone that understood the setbacks of my capabilities, his own gift of controlling emotions was a godsend. Whenever the task—of blocking thoughts and making it through another endless day—became too much to deal with, Jasper would give me a dose of his own version of heroin.

Back in the 1960's, when free love (sex) and world peace (drugs) were at the forefront of everyone's minds, Jasper would befriend the overindulgent humans who partook in these vices. Once they were as high as a kite, he would absorb the numbing effect their emotions provided, pretending that it was he who was 'love stoned,' as he called it.

When he felt that I was at my wits' end, he would assault me with all of those remembered euphoric feelings, helping me to escape it all for a just a little while.

As the time passed, I found his sessions weren't enough to keep me from being the asexual-gloomy-asshat that Rosalie—my sister and first intended mate—proclaimed me to be, and I was ready to end it all. I thought several times of asking my father to end my half-life, to burn me and spread my ashes far and wide. The idea became more than a passing thought, it became my obsession.

I really just wanted to fucking die.

At first, it was difficult trying to come up with a way to ask him without having Alice find out. But just as Alice knew how to thwart my gift, I found a way to block hers. I thought of everything and nothing, never settling on a decision in order to keep her from seeing anything.

When I was finally ready to ask Carlisle to do it, _she_ arrived.

She smelt just like the roses I wanted to bathe Helen in, and it was wonderful for the first 1.6 seconds that I was able to shamelessly breathe her in. The next minutes, however, were agonizing. Her flowery scent morphed into the equivalent of smelling a juicy steak, and I wanted to devour her. That's when I knew that Carlisle had to kill me soon.

She was creating more _work_ for me and I hated her for it.

I could no longer think clearly since my thoughts swirled around her, and I was failing miserably at keeping Alice from seeing my plan. So, I decided right then that I would go to Alaska and think of a new way to ask Carlisle to read me my last rites. Alice had seen my original decision, when the girl's scent had caught me off-guard, and I had no other choice but to start scheming from scratch.

Once I was able to concoct a plan without any intervention, I went back to Forks and waited for a good time to approach Carlisle. I'd force him into making a decision if I had to. I'd been playing with his guilt for years, letting him know in subtle ways that I hated the life he had given me. I had no doubt that he would go along with whatever I asked as long as I was convincing enough.

I followed my normal routine of classes, sulking, and hunting. Keeping my plans and anxiety deeply buried from the Emotive and Diviner until I had a chance to talk to my father. Worried about my control, I held my breath when I came in contact with _her_ again. Knowing that leaving a murder to cover-up with my request was unreasonable. While I held my breath for what seemed like the millionth time, I noticed it.

_She_ was silent.

I don't mean that she was silent in the way that she didn't say anything, because she did. Her eyes would flutter and these incoherent mumblings would leave her pretty pink lips. My vampire hearing easily caught these sounds, and I introduced myself, wanting to make sure I wasn't imagining things. Thankfully, I wasn't delusional. Her mind was completely silent.

Breathing in slowly, I tested the air around me, seeing if her scent would make her mutism worth the effort I was considering pouring into her. My throat burned, but nothing like that first day. The rose scent overpowered the eat-me-now smell…

Suddenly, death didn't look like my only option.

I wanted to protect this girl. Shield her weak body and protect this goldmine I had discovered.

Gold-mind.

And that's what I did. I spent the next year protecting Bella's—_her_ name—frail body that smelled like my Helen's would have if I ever had a chance to run that bath. And I protected her mind that was my healing balm, not letting her think too hard or make too many decisions because…I didn't want her to break the silence. And I protected her virtue, because she was hornier than the male population of Forks, and I couldn't risk accidentally killing her.

I couldn't risk reading her thoughts when we both reached our peaks. I couldn't risk her finding out that I hadn't yet mastered that coming in less than five seconds thing. No, I could do nothing to risk the goldmine.

Gold-mind.

Every day was wonderful. Except for that time the nomadic guy tried to steal, and then kill my goldmine. I didn't have to do much in that battle because Jasper and Alice took care of James, but I did feel bad that gold…I mean, _Bella_ had to go through that at all. Although, I got over it rather quickly, chalking it up to her human stupidity and the fact that Alice should have seen it coming.

The hardest part about that day was keeping my bloodlust in check while Bella writhed in pain from James's vicious bite.

"_You have to decide," Carlisle said. "Change her, or suck out the venom."_

And I was annoyed at all the work gold…_Bella_, was creating for me because she wasn't supposed to _be_ work. She was supposed to be quiet, and obedient, and mine.

"_No way am I changing her. It will break her mind, her silence," I thought, but instead said. "I won't let her live like this." _

I immediately knew that I'd made the right decision.

As her succulent blood coated my throat, I could hear her. Bella's lips weren't moving, but her thoughts were in my head! She was begging me to change her, telling me she loved me…

I sucked harder to get the venom out.

Carlisle confused this with a loss of control, and tried to will me away from her. But I didn't move until her silence had fully returned.

Soon enough, things went back to normal, and I took care of my human with the beautiful silent mind because I loved _it_. And my days continued to be work-free because everyone thought I deserved a break after a hundred years of solitude.

Life for the undead was good.

There were times when Bella would make me work… Work to keep Rosalie happy because she hated having her around. Work to keep Jasper from attacking her because the lure of her blood was tempting, and work to keep myself from saying 'I love you, too,' because as love goes, I didn't really love _her_.

So, I told her she would never understand what it was to love as a vampire did, and she took that to mean that I loved her back. Not bothering to correct her because it wasn't a complete lie, and I didn't feel like making the effort, I went with it. Because I did love being her hero, I did love that she smelled like Helen's roses, I did love protecting her the way I wanted to protect my country.

Well, I did _mostly, sort of, I think…_

When she became more work than I thought necessary, I would say there was a hunting trip we'd planned and avoid her. Or sometimes, I would _decide_ to date Angela Weber so that Alice's visions of Angela and I together could entertain me. Her visions would remind me that if Bella ever became too much, there were still other options.

Angela's mental voice was quiet and usually in line with my own thoughts, so it wouldn't be horrible. Her looks were comparable to Bella's, but her breasts were fuller and she walked with confidence—attributes I admired. As always, I would push the thoughts away for that very reason. Angela _was_ confident, and as sexy as it could be, I knew it could lead to her being bossy or demanding and I didn't want that. One Rosalie in the house was enough!

As I stood at Bella's side, watching her blush as Alice presented a slew of birthday presents to her, I couldn't help but smile. After a century of managing my control, and being forced by my talent to be alone, things had finally changed. I was finally going to get the break that I needed.

However, the vibe in the room felt off.

I dove outside of Bella's quiet fortress just long enough to feel a staggering sense of pure hatred before it swiftly vanished. Jasper didn't hide it fast enough though, and I saw that his pitch black eyes were trained on my goldmine.

Golden and Mine.

There was no way in hell I was going to let him take her from me. I'd worked too hard to get to this moment in time. I wasn't stupid; I knew he hated her, that he couldn't stand her selfishness. But I was selfish too, because I didn't care how she made anyone else feel.

She made _me_ feel good.

Maybe the real Edward Masen—who wasn't really sure what he wanted—would've hesitated, but Edward Cullen…Edward Cullen would fight. He would fight to protect this girl with everything within him because she was Helen's roses, she was marriage, and she was another trip to another university.

More importantly, she was my mute, and I, her hero. So, as I forcefully pushed her away, and dropped to a low crouch in front of her bleeding body, I prepared to fight my favorite brother because I loved Bella.

_Mostly, sort of, I think._


End file.
